July in Reflection ~ August at Present 2023
So much swirling. Nauseous, spinning dizziness as you try to grasp—try to produce—try to force your hands to do—to make—to conjure everything you’ve set your eyes on. You reached out hoping (finally) to claim and yield the power of your magic only to have found your fears, old stories, and all the things that calcify your limitations. You were standing in the thick of something that just wasn’t quite right, no matter how much better it seemed on the surface, no matter how much you shifted and approached with better intension. You reached out only to receive the same old paper cuts that, though small, sting like hell and erode away at your resolve. You made a little movement, but all that you created were some sparks that extinguished as quickly as they ignited. This was the experience of forcing something that just did not want to come to fruition. This was the experience of trying to move against your grain. You tried to soothe yourself through the discomfort to no avail.
In the end, the body refuses movement that is unnatural and misaligned. The body knows what we need best: it’s the wisdom of the body that knows that it’s time to go to bed when the sun sets. Let the sun set, stop pretending you have a choice in the matter. You can’t alter the movement of celestial bodies or manipulate larger forces to your will. Humble yourself enough to accept that when something is over, it’s time for it to be over. Here is where we work on surrendering, work on letting go and being open to being guided and directed toward all that is much better than what we could create for ourselves. So much more is waiting for you, the trick is to ease up on your grasp and open your capacity to follow where you’re being lead.
It’s time to take a break and nurture all that needs healing in you. There is so much you’ve been ignoring or setting aside that has been crying out for your tender care. It’s time for you to shine a little light on the small, sad parts of you that are hiding in your corners. You won’t be able to move forward in fullness until you scoop them up in your arms, swaddle them in love, and sprinkle them with a little stardust. This month is about being your own guardian angel. Put on your most sparkly dress, a pair of dramatically feathered wings, and wave your wand about. It’s time to get ridiculous—childish, even, in the way that you approach joy. You’re so desperately in need tending that it’s time to get down to the basics: simple, unadulterated fun. Give yourself what you never got as a child. What is it that you love to do? Do that. For now, ignore what you’re supposed to do—what is it that you want to do? Do that. What makes you feel good? Do that. What lights you up? Say oh, yes! to that. It’s okay to trust what feels good; you have it in you to learn to feel safe. You know best, listen to yourself and live in the authority of your intuition. Allow yourself to prioritize the things your little wounds need to recover and mend. It’s time to recuperate so that you can move forward and step into the things that are waiting for you after this pause—they are waiting and they will be there for you, but first catch your breath. Reconnect with your joy so that you’re able to bring it with you now and in the future.
“Apparition: A Spirit Speak Tarot Deck” by Mary Elizabeth Evans